Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.
14 & pregnant
My story starts when I was at the park binge drinking,
I was only 14 at the time & was doing what all 14 year olds do. The next morning I woke up in the park next to a friend who was about the age of 20.
I freaked out when I found my fly undone. I ran up to the shops & was fearing the worst. I took the test home and it was positive.
I cried and cried and told my mum the next day. My mum flipped out and kicked me out. I lived at my friend that was 20's house and I told him after a few weeks that I thought he was the father of my unborn child. He didnít believe and said he would take a test to prove he wasn't.
So we had the test done, and it came back saying he was the father. He got mad and abused me for weeks. I left and lived in the park. I stayed there for 7 weeks until my mum finally let me back in the house, by now I was 6 months pregnant.
Two months went by, and I had gained lots of support from my mother. Then at 8 months I went into labor. The doctors were freaking out and I was really scared. I gave birth but I had miscarried. I was devastated I had gone through so much, for nothing.
I am now 17 and have had a son since, and am now pregnant with twin girls. I couldnít be happier.
babies lost at 10 and 20 weeksA year ago I lost a baby at 10 weeks. I was devastated beyond what I ever thought possible. I bled quite a bit, so I was very weak afterwards. I remember just laying on the couch for a week, soaking in the sunrays, having no energy to eat or do anything else. I felt empty, like my womb had bled away, and left a big gaping hole. I unintentionally got pregnant again 2 months later. I was still grieving the first baby, but the pregnancy gave me hope, though I was constantly worried I would miscarry. When 12 weeks passed, I started to relax a bit. Everything seemed to be going well. Though I could never quite believe I was going to actually have a baby. I loved feeling of the baby kicks and feeling my womb grow. I was never confident however, and I checked for blood every day. It was a torment, but I kept telling myself I was just worried because of the other miscarriage.
Then at 20 weeks, I had a day of what I thought were ligament pains. I was in labor. Around midnight, I was in bed with a hot water bottle, when I felt something drop. I stood up, and the baby, completely in the bag of water, with the placenta, fell out of me, into my hands. Shocking and horrible. But now that I've had 6 months to reflect upon it, I'm glad it happened like it did. I was at home, with my husband, and we were able to enjoy our son without pressure. We took him out of the bag and appreciated his perfect little 8-inch body. Everything was so perfect, tiny fingers, ribs, mouth. He even looked like my other boys. He did have what I think was a spinal tube defect, with swelling at the base of his skull. My husband took lots of pictures and we took hand and foot prints as well. I held him all night. We named him Adrian. Like I said, its been 6 months now, and I'm still deeply grieving. I have a local support group, which has helped, and I've been reading a lot of books on grief and pregnancy loss. It at least helps me feel like I'm not insane.
I know now that itís going to take a long time to get through this. I was numb and confused for a couple months. It is just now that I'm fully understanding that it actually happened to me, that I'm not still secretly pregnant. It was so confusing, but I now realize that the body has to let you down slowly-----itís just too much to fully realize it all at once. I was too afraid for a long time to think about the baby I was NOT having in January, to really imagine how he would be. But now I can, and the longing is very difficult, but itís not impossible.
You think you can't take it and you will just shrivel up and die, but you don't. Sometimes I just take it second by second. Itís so hard, and I feel very misunderstood most of the time. Itís hard not to become an alcoholic, hard to take care of my other children, hard to get through the day with any kind of energy or hope. But at the same time, I already appreciate the things I have learned.
My heart goes out to all of you.
The loss of my babyI found out I was pregnant when I was six weeks and I was so excited when I found out.I started telling all my family members and they were glad I always thought I wasn't going to be able to conceive because my husband and I had been together for ten years and never got pregnant.
I was ten weeks pregant when I had the miscarriage and it was probably the worst day. I thought it was all a dream. I cried for days and could not contain my emotions.
I just hope that God will one day give us a baby.
was it twins?About 5 yrs ago I had my second baby, which was a boy. I kept having stomach pains after his birth. I kept asking the doctor about the pain, 6 months later he tells me I am pregnant again. Wow, I think again. After about 2 months of back and forth to the doctor and ultrasounds they finally say I am not really pregnant. I think how can that be?
He asked me if I had been bleeding or anything, I respond with " No". So he says if I don't start bleeding between now and next week I would have a D&C. So the next week came and I am still not bleeding, he still schedules me for the procedure. He said I had the sac and such but the baby never developed, meaning there was no baby.
I was very confused and didnít understand at all. I went ahead with what he said to do because he is the doctor, right? And now I wonder could this have been a twin to my pregnancy 6 months before?
own your ownRecently after leaving a difficult marriage, I pursued a new career attending college as my 3 children are in school now.
I met a new guy, things were great, until in Dec I realized I was 3 weeks late, I was on my pill. I put it down to stress.
I began to bleed mid-January. I knew myself then that I must have been pregnant. I was in so much pain, but it passed. My doctor told me there was no real way of telling, he told me to leave it a few weeks and if I still had cramping I would need a d & c.
I had an appt, which was at the last minute put off due to two emergencies in the dept, so I am waiting on another appt.
My "partner" however said he does not believe a word of this and it never happened. The realization is now hitting me that I did loose a baby. I feel very alone, and he wonít even speak to me. I donít know where he is. I need him to help me with this.
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