Pregnancy Loss

Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.

It is best to avoid using stimulants during pregnancy. Amphetamines and dextroamphetamines are powerful drugs and when taken during pregnancy, they can cause miscarriage, early labor or birth defects. You may want to ask other women if they have had personal experience with this.


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My beloved one


We found out about our pregnancy 3 days before our first wedding anniversary. It was a bit of a surprise, but we were thrilled! Our wheels were spinning as we made all the plans to prepare for this little one – had to find the perfect home to buy, just the right crib, my mom would make the baby quilt that would tenderly cover my baby at night. In a matter of 6 days, I fell more in love with this child than I’ve ever been with anything in my entire life. I watched every sign that my body was changing with joy and thanked the Lord for giving me this child. I prayed for its health, and that it would be born without any problems. I believed that everything would be just right and felt encouraged that I was already having so much morning sickness – a good sign, everything seemed to say.

And then I woke up a week later in a horrible panic. I felt it in my body and my spirit that it was all over. I rushed to the bathroom and saw the thick blood. I knew that my baby had gone to be with Jesus. I cried…

The Dr. said he wanted to do an ultrasound and a blood test, that maybe it wasn’t a miscarriage but just some bleeding. I knew better. I knew that my baby had left this world already. I saw the empty uterus on the ultrasound and my heart tore in two as my feelings were confirmed. “Yes, all signs point to a miscarriage”, they all said.

And I cried…


Kelly






i thought i had dealt with it

Exactly 2 yrs ago I felt I was pregnant but did not check until I got home (because I was on the first holiday with my son (11mths old) and husband after so long. I kept feeling listless and lethargic but, being a nurse, I put it down to first trimester issues.

A home pregnancy test confirmed my pregnancy and I saw my GP as soon as I could. I reported to him that I wasn’t sure of my last menstruation date and was having severe cramps on my left ovary. After examining me he sighed 'hmmm' (you know the worrying ones – doctors do so well). He wasn't happy with my cramps so sent me for an emergency scan. The doctor on call ruled out ectopic pregnancy and because it was so late, he asked me to come back for a scan the next day. I did (all throughout this time I didn't tell my husband because I thought it was routine).

A sonographer told me without any preparation that ' I’m sorry I can't see a heartbeat and I need a second opinion'. I asked her to explain and she said 'your baby is dead'. OH MY GOD! WHY? WHAT HAPPENED? I planned surgery immediately because I couldn't bear carrying something dead in me. A month after the surgery, I still had to have another surgery because some bits were left inside me (it was as if I suffered 2 miscarriages).

Being a Christian, I put it down to God's way being the best. But...today at my local bank, I heard a woman was in the toilet waiting for an ambulance because she'd miscarried, then it dawned on me that the same thing happened to me and I did nothing about it. OH I AM HURTING SO BAD!!! I pray that this woman finds strength to carry on. I've been blessed with another son and I draw my strength from them but HOW CAN I FILL THIS VACUUM when I’m told that it's one of those things?

I can't talk to my husband because he doesn’t want to talk about it. Please help me pray that God grants me the serenity to accept the things I can’t do, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I hope all you ladies out there find comfort and joy soon. Thank you and merry Christmas


Kelly






i thought i had dealt with it

Exactly 2 yrs ago I felt I was pregnant but did not check until I got home because I was on the first holiday with my son (11mths old) and husband after so long. I kept feeling listless and lethargic but being a nurse, I put it down to first trimester issues.

A home pregnancy test confirmed my pregnancy and I saw my GP as soon as I could, I reported to him that I wasn't sure of my last menstruation date and was having severe cramps on my left ovary. After examining me he sighed 'hmmm' (you know the worrying ones doctors do so well). He wasn't happy with my cramps so sent me for an emergency scan. The doctor on call ruled out ectopic pregnancy and because it was so late, he asked me to come back for a scan the next day. I did (all throughout this time I didn't tell my husband because I thought it was routine).

A sonographer told me without any preparation that ' I'm sorry I can't see a heartbeat and I need a second opinion'. I asked her to explain and she said 'your baby is dead'. OH MY GOD! WHY WHAT HAPPENED? I planned surgery immediately because I couldn't bear carrying something dead in me. A month after the surgery, I still had to have another surgery because some bits were left inside me (it was as if I suffered 2 miscarriages). Being a Christian, I put it down to God's way being the best. But........today at my local bank, I heard a woman was in the toilet waiting for an ambulance because she'd miscarried then it dawned on me that the same thing happened to me and I did nothing about it.

OH I AM HURTING SO BAD!! And I pray that this woman finds strength to carry on. I've been blessed with another son and I draw my strength from them but HOW CAN I FILL THIS VACUUM when I'm told that it's just one of those things? I can't talk to my husband because he doesn't want to talk about it. Please help me pray that God grants me the serenity to accept the things I can't do, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I hope all you ladies out there find comfort and joy soon. Thank you and merry Christmas.


Kelly






loss

In august I discovered I was having a baby, I was shocked, tearful but so delighted to be mum again. We were looking forward to spring to new life in our family. Sadly I bled at 20 weeks, I went to the hospital with my mum as my husband was in Ireland. The doctor did a scan - no heartbeat, and baby had died 5 weeks earlier.

Tears never seem to go away and my heart aches so much. I had a terrible time in hospital, I lost so much blood. Nobody checked me. Then for 3 days I had internals, medication put inside to make me have a labor by the 4 day I had enough, I needed surgery, a scan showed the baby had gone. Where, I don’t know. That’s the hard part.


denise






D&C tomorrow/Merry Christmas?

I woke up and started crying again. I do not understand... I am praying to God so hard for understanding. I realized that this short span of motherhood is all that I may ever get. Why would the Lord give us a baby with a beating heart only to take it away? Why would He make me think this was going to be the best Christmas ever just to become the worst? On the day I am supposed to hear the wonderful heartbeat, there is none and my baby has been dead inside me for a week? How can God be this cruel? God can do ANYTHING-why would he WANT to do that? I feel like throwing up.

The 5th of July was our due date and it was so perfect...we were going to have fireworks when this baby was born. To be able to put two years of infertility treatments behind us...move on...it was such a relief and now we are back to square one after this horrible twist of fate. God teased us so badly. I feel like I let Him down or something and I keep apologizing to my baby.... little baby, I am so sorry that I was not able to keep your heart beating. I feel like a failure and that I just can't be a mom. Maybe there is something wrong with me and I am just not cut out for it?

The Bible says all of this stuff about motherhood and that God can do anything and that we are supposed to have children...but He will not let me have one. I have been patient, faithful, trusting in Him. This is so unfair to John too. I just do not get it...


Dana







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