Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.
Miscarriage at 6.5 weeks
I have had a week of pain and worry and then last night I lost a lot of blood, I am still in quite a lot of pain and I am sure that I am in the process of miscarrying. I had already seen the fetus on a scan, and it's heartbeat, and for me the blow of the loss is at the moment too much for me. I have fallen into a pit of despair and I don't know how to pull myself out at.
R.I.P my angel cristianI was 31 weeeks pregnant when i lost my baby. it all started when i was 6 months i was seeing a maternal fetus specialist and the doctor started to tell me that there is something wrong with the babys heart and it was a boy by the way, so i had to follow up with the doctor every other day and every week to get ultrasounds so they can keep checking him, i was sent to the cardiologist for children so they can see what was going on, and theywere so stupid that they couldnt even find what was really wrong with his heart! so i kept on goin for ultradounds every week and every other day, until one day i woke up and did not feel him moving but i had an appt with the doc for an ultrasound that morning which was on nov. 13, 08 so i went and when i laid down and the the doc started to do the ultrasound he said there was no heartbeat and that i lost the baby, i just fell like the world was tumbling down on me ,because i was so excited to be a first time mom and was almost a little more than half way there and unfortunately i received the worst news ever. so i was induced the next day and delivered my baby naturally. so i creamated my baby and now i have his ashes. i also received the autopsy results and it said that he had an inflammation in his heart because it was not developing the way it should of and that the chromosomes were normal. i just wanted to know if any one suffered from anxiety and depression after their loss because i am now getting better thanks to god from my severe anxiety, panick attacks and depression that i went through after i lost my baby.
Armed with information, I chose a D&CI found out my fetus was no longer alive at my first ultrasound - what would have been 10 weeks. I had no symptoms of miscarriage, but I could tell immediately that the heart was not beating and the baby was not moving.
I went through several days of complete sadness. My face became so swollen from crying that I thought I was having an allergic reaction.
Then I began to research my options (my doctor seemed so awkward in dealing with my sadness. I had to ask her everything about next steps or she would only say "I'm so sorry". Doesn't this happen in 1 out of 4 pregnancies?! At a time like this, when you are not feeling confident, you want your health care provider to provide information that gives you reassurance. Anyway...)
I read a ton on the internet in the next week, and in some books I had on fertility. I now can recommend, "Our Bodies, Ourselves". It explained the D&E / D&C procedure in detail and the level of risk (which is equivalent to having a miscarriage). I choose to have a D&E. It was scheduled as an outpatient surgery. Everyone I dealt with at the hospital was so compassionate. I was nervous about being put to sleep, but it all went painlessly and fast. It took about 35 minutes. The surgeon was able to speak with me as soon as I woke up and let me know that there were no complications. I had very mild cramping and only the faintest trace of bleeding for about 4 days. It has now been almost one month and I think I have ovulated.
I am hopeful about a future pregnancy, but I will probably wait about 4 months to emotionally recover from this experience. My advice to anyone else in this situation is to talk to women you know. I have learned so much in the past month and made the transition from blaming myself for the loss of my pregnancy, to being strong and supportive of my own self and feeling healthy.
Much love and luck, Molly
My HeronMy husband and I had not planned on having a third child, but it happened. At first, we were shocked, but then we began to look forward to making a family of five. We already had two strong, healthy boys.
At 13 week, I woke up to a rush of blood. Called the doctor and went in for a US--baby was fine. Strong heartbeat, everything looked okay.
At 36 weeks, I went in for a normal appointment and they could not find his heartbeat. Three different doctors did an ultrasound just to confirm, but he was gone. I had not noticed a lapse in movement...but there had to have been one. Even once they told me he was gone, I still felt movement.
I had a C-section, since my other two births were also C-Sections. Knowing you are going into the operating room to remove your dead son is something no one should have to do. I am so thankful for my husband, two boys and family. They give me the strength and courage to continue.
We buried our sweet Heron on January 19, 2009. During the service, a heron flew over the burial. Our little angle let us know he was watching.
For those who may ever have to go through such a horrible event, do take the suggestions of the doctors and nurses and hold your child. Take pictures if you can. Dress him or her in the clothes you would have brought him/her home in. We relish having those positive lasting memories of our son.
My Angel In HeavenI lost my baby just two weeks ago. My husband and I have three girls and where hoping for a Boy. This had to be it no more try's. When we found out that we where going to have a baby we where not to sure what to think. But as the days went by the joy for our new baby grew. I started out rocky bleeding in the first six weeks, off to the hospital and everything was fine. Put me on drugs to help keep the baby. Few weeks later the same thing happened more bleeding. So we called the doctor and had to go for an ultrasound and blood work, got to see the baby on the screen it was real the baby was alive. We went to Doctors appointments and heard the heartbeat. It was 147 strong and healthy. Then at about 18 weeks the same thing more bleeding and off to the ER. They did all of the same test and another ultrasound but this time there was not heartbeat. They told me that there would be no baby, and of all places to send me they put me on the labor and delivery floor. I was induced for labor and delivered my baby. We found out that he was a boy. we opted told him and name him. he fit in the palm of my hand and weighed about 2 oz. His name was Angel. My husband and i have had to deal with this loss and chose to have a memorial for him and had him baptized. I take everyday for what it is and know that I will have good days and bad days. But there is one thing that i know for sure, I will never go a day without thinking of my Angel.
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