Single Moms

It's not easy being a single mom. As a single parent, you have to take on double the parenting duty. Other issues can make this even more complex. For example, some young moms write about what to do if my boyfriend is an alcoholic. Please share your experience and wisdom. As you will see, these problems require a great support system, time management skills and top-notch parenting techniques. If you have tips to share with other single moms or just want to help other single mothers and single parents out there, then tell us your story.


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Not so bad


I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant March of 2006. I knew because my boyfriend told me. Serves us right for not using condoms and I had just got a car, so I would leave school to see him all the time.

Anyways after I told him, he was like, "man this is gone be tough" but I want us to be a family. I was the one asking him what he wanted. His family was happy. Nov, 28, 2006 I gave birth to our daughter, and now weíre planning to get married and move into together at the end of the year.

I also plan to attend a local college for nursing in a month.

All in all, boys are not all bad.


kendra






he's just not worth it

I was 1 month and 6 days pregnant when I found out. I was out of the country and there was no way for me to get a hold of the babyís daddy. My family kept on trying to talk me into giving the baby up for adoption or getting an abortion but I just couldnít do it. The baby was my little angel... she is my hero. If it werenít for her I would still be using drugs- if not dead.

I got a hold of my baby daddyís friend and I told him about the baby.

I came back to the States and looked for him but I just couldnít find him. All his friends are hiding him.

He's a gang member, a drug dealer, and a druggie himself- even if he wanted to be in my daughterís life I wouldnít let him. I still wish there was a way for me to at least talk to him because you never know... she can also change his life around like she changed mine.

I'm not in school right now because its just too hard and Iím going to start working 3 jobs. But Iím getting back in school sometime this week.

I donít need a man in my life to get through raising my daughter- I just need to be strong and keep my head up.

And the day he decides to show his face- who knows- many I will give him a chance to see her- but only if heís changed.

My daughter doesnít deserve to live the gangster life.


lala






stop and think

I found out I was pregnant on the first day of my junior year in high school. I asked the daddy how much he really loved me before I would tell him what was going on. He told me he loved me and wouldn't leave me over this. He was on some hard drugs for the first month I was pregnant and I felt like he was going down a path I couldn't follow, so we broke up.

We got back together when I was 5 months along because we wanted her to have a real family. He told me we would stay together no matter what for our daughter. I'm due in a month and half and he broke up with me 3 weeks ago. 8 days later he had a new girlfriend. I've cried every day for 3 weeks.

Don't let anyone lie to you; the pain doesn't go away with time. He left me when I needed him the most. I have the support of my friends and family, but Iíve never felt so alone. I get scared sometimes because I wonder if I will be able to love her knowing that she is a part of him. I don't know how I could've been so stupid.

But you can't punish your baby for anything that happens before she gets here. She is the one person I know who will love me no matter what.

Kat






What to do next?

I am 17 years old and just found out I could be pregnant. I told the babyís father, what good would it have been, since I live with him, not to tell him he could have a child on the way?

I told him, and his first reaction was ďIíM NOT GOING TO BE A DADDY! I want nothing to do with this kid, you should get an abortion.Ē

I am totally against abortions so I refused. He kept saying the same thing even though his friends and sister tried to tell him to "man up". A few days after that he told me, ďBaby, if you want this to work out, we can make it work, it will be hard, but we can do it!Ē Thatís all I was waiting to hear from him. I cried of joy.

We told his mother, she said abortion or adoption. Once again Iím against abortion and adoption I would MUCH rather do. I mean I donít think I should do that either, it was his and my mistake; you canít just toss mistakes to the side like they are nothing! A baby is a different story.

After talking to his mother, he changed his ways again, ďyou should get an abortion, put it up for adoption, Iím 19, I canít do this, I'm NOT going to be a daddy.Ē

I cannot force it upon him, it is his decision, all I know is I WILL raise this kid to the best of my ability, it was my wrongdoing, I will do it myself, it will be HARD but I know with God by my side, itís possible.

Iím writing this for motivation for all you teen parents out there who are alone. YOUíRE NOT!!! God is right with you and he will be the one to NEVER leave. I donít have my parents around me anymore since 16, no family, no friends but Iím determined to prove to everyone, I can do this and not mess my life up. Things WILL get better, not over night with time and patients, but in the end you can be the one saying ďI raised this beautiful child alone, IíM DAMN PROUD!Ē


Khrystin






Little One

I first found out I was pregnant April 22, 2005. I was a sophomore. I went to the doctor and was told I was six and a half months pregnant. I was so confused. I didnít know what to do. I couldn't believe I was pregnant. How was I going to tell my mom, and my boyfriend?

When I told my boyfriend he said he knew and that he was happy. I found out I was having a boy a week later. When I came back to school my friend had told another girl that was pregnant that I was pregnant. I didnít like the fact that I had people in my business. Although I was showing a little, I didnít want people in my business. We were to leave school June 16, 2005, but I left a week before because it was almost time for me to have my baby.

I had my baby June 30th 2005. He weighed 5 pounds and 7 ounces. I love my baby so much. When I was a junior a lot of people, like my friend, kept asking, "where's the baby? Whereís the baby?" and I didnít tell them anything. I'm now a senior and I'm pregnant again. I'm not sure how many weeks or months I may be I just hope I'm not too far along.

To all the young mothers out there like me: donít give up. I know some of you are single mothers, but that donít mean itís not going to be hard, all you got to do is keep your head up and God will have your back the rest of the way on.


MeMa







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