Single Moms

It's not easy being a single mom. As a single parent, you have to take on double the parenting duty. Other issues can make this even more complex. For example, some young moms write about what to do if my boyfriend is an alcoholic. Please share your experience and wisdom. As you will see, these problems require a great support system, time management skills and top-notch parenting techniques. If you have tips to share with other single moms or just want to help other single mothers and single parents out there, then tell us your story.


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MY BABY GIRL


My name is tameka . i got pregnant when i was 16. I was with my babys dady for about 8 months and he was hella exiteded to have a baby. but when i was about twon moths along he broke up with me and we went our seperate ways untill i was 6 months we decided to make things work but he had been on some really bad drugs and so he went to treatment and when he got out i was 8 months he lived with his mom (who did not want me to have the baby) he then went back to hanging out with all his friends who were on drugs and i went in to labor at school on september 14 he had been useing so he did not come up to the hospital i had my daughter Alexis lynn on september 15 and 5:35 am. my baby dad has seen her once and is now in jail and is begging for me and my daughter amnd wants another baby lol but i would rather not have anymore kids for a while . because as a mother i would not want what my daughter to go through what he put me through.

Tameka






Almost Perfect

My name is Alyssa. I was never the girl to drink, smoke, or do drugs and I came from a pretty good family. I did very well in school and had a dream of going to Yale. I practically had my entire life planned out in front of me. I never thought that I would be one of the girls who got pregnant. I didnít have anything wrong with them; I just didnít want a baby at 13, 14, 15, or 16. I kind of made a vow to myself that I would not have a baby until I was out of collage and had a good job, but that all changed a little bit before my 13th birthday.

When I was 12 I met this guy named Garret. He was amazing and the perfect guy for me. He was the most popular guy in school, captain of the football team, president of student council, cutest guy ever, and possibly the sweetest person alive. He also came from a good family and did excellent in school. He also had the goal of going to Yale. His older sister was one of my best friends. My family and his family were very good friends, and they thought that we were destined to be together.

We were dating for about a year when he took me to his friendís party. His friendís parents werenít home so there was drugs and drinking there. Garret and I werenít really into that kind of stuff so we left. His house was only a couple minutes away so we walked there. No one was home because they all went to see my parents. He said that we should probably take advantage of the opportunity we had before us then he asked me if we could ďdo it.Ē I said yes, of course. I wasnít on birth control so he used a condom. We never thought that I could get pregnant.

A couple days later I was feeling tired all the time and having morning sickness. I told Garretís sister, Mandy, and she went and got me a few pregnancy tests. All of them came out positive. I was so scared that I almost fainted.

The first thing I did was call Garret and he said that he would stick by me no matter what. Then we went to tell my parents. They were extremely shocked and even considered kicking me out of the house. After they calmed down they refused to talk to me for almost 3 weeks. Garretís parents were more supportive and they said that they would take me in as one of their own if needed.

School was a little tougher. Most of the people that I thought were my friends just deserted me. I met some people that actually liked me for me and didnít care that I was pregnant and 13. Sure I missed some of the friends that I had before, but now I had new ones. Mandy was always there for me and I am very glad for that.

My pregnancy was pretty normal, nothing really changed. My relationship with Garret actually got better because we were so happy to see the baby. Mandy and I were still best friends. My parents were still mad that I broke the promise that I made to myself. Garretís parents were still there for me. Nothing really changed.

On November 10th I went into labor. I gave birth to my beautiful baby girl at 11:13am. Garret and I named her Brielle Maryssa. She is our world and I would do anything for her. She is a beautiful baby and I wouldn't change anything about her.

Garret and I are still together and loving every minute of it. My parents renovated to garage so that Brielle and I could stay there. Garret comes over a lot and sometimes my parents let him stay overnight. I miss out on a lot because I have to take care of Brielle but Garret comes over and keeps me company.

Sure itís not very surreal to have a baby at 13, but I love my little girl. Itís hard to juggle school, the baby, and a social life, but I love it. Garret and I donít regret anything that we did because it led us to Brielle. I love him and my baby girl.

Missy






Im'...i'm pergnant?!?

I was so happy in grade 10 when I got my first boyfriend..Travis, we loved each other and things got serious fast. On October 31st we went to a Halloween party and decided to go upstairs. I was prepared for my monthly to happen, but it never did. I thought that maybe my counting was off, so I waited for a few weeks, but when it still never came I told my friends everything that happened, I told Travis because I though he deserved to know. So that day after school me and my friends went up to our local drug store to get a pregnancy test. I was scared to take the test, but around supper time I knew I was pregnant. I phoned Travis right away and we decided to go meet at the coffee shop to discuss things. When I got to the shop I walked up to where Travis was sitting and he pulled me into a big hug. WE decided that we would go to the doctor just to make absolute sure that I was the 1 in 1000 girls to get the wrong answer.
So 2 days later we went up to the doctor and sure enough I was pregnant.. we sat both families down at once to tell them what was happening they were all shocked at first but once they got over that they seemed happy that my mom and dad were going to be grandparents as Travis' sister had already had 1 baby. As the days got closer and closer. I couldn't handle going to school, I couldn't handle all the stares, whispers and points.

Finally the day arrived and I gave birth to my beautiful baby girl, Elle, as Travis and I both moved into out into our own little apartment, 2 blocks from my mom and dad's house and 10 houses away from his. I was the one always looking after Elle, Travis couldn't handle it, not being able to party with his friends. We needed some space so I went to stay at my house for the weekend with little Elle. I forgot the dipars, so I went back to the apartment to find Travis in bed with another girl from my school. So right then and there I decided we were over. To no surprise the other girl ended up pregnant as well. I moved in with my mom and dad with Elle, Travis still came to visit, until he decided he didnt want to be a part of our little girl's life.


Now elle calls a new boy "daddy"
Blake, the best dad in the world!


PS.Sorry this took so long to read.

Adriene






No such thing as never.

When I was younger I always heard horror stories of teen pregnancy, and the young mothers struggling to make end meet every day. I recognize that this is, unfortunately, how it is for nearly all teenage mothers. When I was 18 years old, and still a senior in high school, I discovered that I was pregnant. I had been with my boyfriend for 1 year and 5 months. needless to say, we were both scared and worried about what steps we should take. I panicked about telling my parents, and tried to forget about what was happening for as long as I could. Finally, I could put it off no longer. I announced my pregnancy to my family, anf my boyfriend announced it to his. After the initial shock wore off, the mothers and I had a female meeting about what to do. I was 4 months along at this time, and I still had not made up my mind. Adoption was heavily pressed in my face from all sides, sadly from my boyfriend as well. I decided then and there in the meeting that I would be the strong one. I have always been able to make up my mind and stick to it, no matter what the challenges. I declared that my baby would be mine, and be damned any who said otherwise. My boyfriend suffered from a few months of debating whether he wanted to be in our child's life, but after seeing my strength and fortitude, he came to realize that our baby was happening, and that I had the power to overcome any obstacles. I think that it was my strong-mindedness that eventually brought all the families on board. My boyfriend attended all of my doctors appointments, and we graduated our high school year successfully, with me in my 5th month of pregnancy. That summer was a learning experience, and we started to take our first steps towards our new family life. My boyfriend searched high and low to find a job that would make us enough money to support a household, and our living expenses. On October 21st, 2003 our daughter, Lorelei, was born and immediately put into my bawling boyfriend's arms. I remember the look in his eyes as he cried over "the most beautiful little girl in the world." For the seven days I was in the hospital (I had complications) he never let her out of his sight. I was unable to feed her, and he took it upon himself to feed her, change her, and would only grudgingly give her up to me. I think that my boyfriend had found what he calls his "meaning of life." The next few years passed by quickly with my boyfriend and my daughter's bond growing stronger every day. At the age of 20, at Lorelei's 2nd birthday party my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying he wanted to try to give back to me all that I had given him. We were married and my now husband demanded that our daughter be in his arms during the ceremony. I was lucky enough to have a family support structure that was strong enough to allow me to go to college, and graduate with honors with a bachelors degree in Biotechnology. As of now, my marriage is stronger than I ever thought a marriage could be, and I am finishing up graduate school with a PhD in Pathobiology. My husband has yet to finish school, but says that as I have amazing job prospects, all he wants to do is be a stay at home dad. Lorelei is now 6 years old, and I have the satisfaction of arriving home every night in time to watch my husband drift off to sleep holding our daughter in one hand, and a story book in the other.
What I would say to those of you in positions that are scary and uncertain, is that you have no one stronger to rely on than yourself. If you have the confidence to take control of your life, then things will fall into place much more readily than if you try to beg and plead for your boyfriends to stay with you because you need them. Of course you need them, but you are stronger than you think you are, and no matter what the outcome, your love for your child will exceed anything else you can possibly imagine. So take heart, and get ready for the most amazing experience of your life.

Amberlynn






mom

i am a single mom and i just gave birth to two 5/5 pound baby boys and there named after the dad ryan and isaah are the best babys ican love and i will tell you i was blessed by god they are 2 weeks today

breanna







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