Even though infertility affects at least 10% of the population, most couples feel as though they are the only ones struggling through it. Help give some reassurance to those encountering fertility problems by talking about your experience. Did you turn to in vitro fertilization or some other form of infertility treatment? Were alternative or natural fertility treatments useful for you? We want to hear your encouraging anecdotes about infertility and fertility treatments.

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to "frustrated"

Dear "frustrated",

I just wanted to tell you that your life means a lot to an awful lot of prople with or without kids. Your life has a meaning to all the people that love you! Yes, it is great to have kids and raise them, but there is more to life than the mere capability of conceiving.

We are having problems as well, but if I think about my husband, or my mum, or my friends, I believe my life is worth living even just because of them. And anyways you could always consider adoption or IVF or other solutions, as long as you do the journey with the person you love.

People that haven't got any problems feel very good in showing how easy it is and how they are been given this great gift by God. Let me tell you: God is way too busy with world peace to get envolved in every particular case and just tell people at dinner to shut up and eat their meal.

By the way: I think the best one is when they say to relax. It's because you're stressed and you think about it that you don't get pregnat. Yeah, right and thank you very much.

A big hug


Keep Hoping

I am about to start my second dose of Clomid. This whole process has just been so hard-- an emotional roller coaster. We had been trying for months but I wasn't getting pregnant. The Dr. finally ran some tests and determined that my progesterone levels were not high enough for ovulation. Now they have put me on the Clomid and apparently I am ovulating now. However, again this month I did not get pregnant. I know I'm supposed to be patient and not stress ('cuz stress can make it worse) but it's so much easier said than done. Me wanting to be pregnant is all I think about! And it's even harder when so many friends and family around me are pregnant! Every single month, I'm so hopeful and then every single month it doesn't happen and I get discouraged. I just feel like it's never going to happen. I keep telling myself if it's meant to be, it will be... just wish I could stop obsessing about it so much.


Under Cover Want-to-be Mom

I have not been honest with myself and others because it hurts me to be honest. I've been married for over 2 years, however I've dated my husband for over 10 years. He took forever to marry me which I knew would not help my case at all since I knew my history. One good thing though, is that God did protect me from disease and STD's. I do feel like I've been terribly careless with my body in my earlier years (19-27) I'm now 40, and so their is a price that must be paid. Looking for love in all the wrong places, I had multiple partners during my 20's. I've had 3 abortions and 1 or 2 ectopic pregnancies. Why should God give me a child now, just because I'm ready, when I had 3 opportunities? I was so selfish and I did not want anyone to look down on me if I had a child out of marriage so I chose to abort. I wish someone, anyone, would have told me the ramifications and the importance of protecting and charishing my body. THe ectopic pregancies came after the 3 abortions and I think it was a result of scar tissue from the abortions. Please forgive me for being so transparent, but it's so important for me to divulge everything in hopes that it will help someone else. I'm also sad that my husband waited so long to ask me to marry him as I knew I wanted to have children and I didn't want to waste time. I decided to just wait for my husband to marry me when he was ready because I had approximately 15 partners during my late teens and 20's and I just didn'twant to sleep with any other man. Now that I'm finally married and older, people automatically ask, "when are you going to have a baby?" People really don't think. Maybe because I know better, I would never, ever ask a woman whose been married for at least a year and is older why she hasn't had a baby. Shouldn't it dawn on the inquirers that something just may be wrong? Do people even care? So, I just lie and say that we don't want any children knowing that I'm dieing on the inside. I'm working with my doctor now and have a hsg scheduled for tomorrow. But unlike someof the other stories on this board, I feel like I did not take care of my body and I'm expecting the worst and I just don't deserve it. I don't know, maybe somehow God will have mercy on me and allow me to get pregnant in my uterus one more time and carry to full term. BUt if He doesn't, I accept my punishment and will move on. Keep holding on to your dreams ladies and I pray the best for healthy pregnancies, and wonderful babies for all of you.

Undercover want-to-be Mom


no boundries

eight years back i had an operate of brain tumor at that time i was not married and the removal of pitutary adn i have a loss of prolactin and no periods i get only periods when i use progyulton i gone through ivf from uae 2 times but no babies plz u all pray for me this time i am going through iui i dont when when i get my own baby.

ghazal fahad

Hoping for a miracle!

Hey everyone! Well, where should I begin? I am 32 going on 33 in December. Sad to say, but since my very first period I realized something was terribly wrong. I had real heavy bleeding lasting for 8-14, sometimes 20 days. The pain was extremely unbearable, there were days when I would crawl around the house on my knees because of the pain. I went to several different doctors over a period of time who told me it's just dysmenaria(painful periods), and they would give me birth control pills of all different strength with each visit to try to ease the pain and decrease the bleeding. This was back in the caribbean where I'm from originally.
When I came to America I still had the problem to be frank it actually got worse. I would pass out from the excess bleeding, because I was so anemic. I tried several doctors here in the beginning but with no improvement. A family member recommended her obgyn office to me and I made an appt. for the next day. Based on the symptoms I revealed to the Dr. made him suspect I may have endometriosis, he also did a ulttrasound which showed I had 7 cysts on my ovaries large enough to qualify for surgery the next two weeks. This was back in1997. I had a laproscopic surgery and this confirmed my Dr's. suspicion for endometriosis. I was 23 then, not married, not planning for kids before marriage, so he decided to supress my system with depopravera shot every 3 months. I did this for 5 long yrs.
I stop the shots in June 2002 because I was getting married in July, and was told I needed to give my body a chance to resume its' normal function because I had not have a period for 5 yrs. My husband and I have been married for 4 yrs. now and never used contraceptives since our marriage and I am still not pregnant. In 2005 I started having real bad menses again and went to see my OBGYN. He did an ultrasound and found that I had 4 large cysts 2 were growing behind my uterus pushing it out of place, I needed surgery ASAP, but this time I needed a bikini cut some call it a c-section or a laporotomy. He had been encouraging me to see a fertility specialist after 1 yr. of unprotected intercourse and no baby/ies, so finally after this surgery, he strongly recommended seeing one for a consultation and I made the appt.
I have been working with my fertility specialist for 13 months now, and what a roller coaster this has been. Every time I feel like a ray of light is beginning to shine throught on my husband and I, WE ACTUALLY TAKE A FEW STEPS BACKWARDS. Earlier this year I did an HSG and my darling husband did a sperm analysis, to get us ready for art. insemination. Unfortunately, I discovered both my tubes are blocked which causes a toxic fluid to form that goes into my uterus. This is very harmful to embryos, it actually kills them. Therefore, my MD decided I needed another surgery to remove my tubes and ivf was my only means of getting pregnant, because I now have stage four endometriosis which is the worse and final stage.
I was devastated by this, my husband was very much fertile but I was full of reproductive issues. I felt less than a woman, I even thought that my husband who I love endlessly and I know he loves me unconditionally was going to give up hope and leave. I felt this way because, he does not have any children and I know it was always his wish to have a wife and children, but I was not able to give him children, at least not naturally. Anything that is not occurring natural for me was always a problem, so I fought with the decision to do ivf, I started to wonder what will others say, and what if I ended up with more than two babies (I've always wanted twins) so this I would'nt mind, but I was just so confused and scared of wheter or not it will work.
Yes I underwnet laprosopic surgery but my fertility specialist was unsucessful because my bowels and my reproductive organs were intertwine by scarred tissue and endometriosis, so he decided to leave my tubes in and still continue with the ivf tx, with high hopes, faith and prayer. The next step was to check to make sure my uterus was perfect for implantation, then comes another problem, I had polyps in my uterus, exactly in the spot where implantation normally occurs, again I needed another surgery. In September I did a hysteroscopic surgery and now I am just waiting for my period to show up so I can start my first ivf cycle. My husband and I are very religeous, we believe in miracles, and we are praying and hoping for our miracle.
Everyone please pray for us that our faith will remain strong. I personally do not believe God has brought us this far to leave us! I will keep you posted on the making of our miracle. God bless! DES


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