Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.
poem for kenneth
YOU WERE BORN ON A THURSDAY ON THE 20TH DECEMBER
A DAY IN MY LIFE I WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER,
GOING BACK TO JULY WHEN YOU WERE CONCEIVED
IT WAS THE 7TH OF AUGUST,THE BEST NEWS I RECEIVED.
WE PLANNED AND TRIED FOR YOU FOR ALMOST A YEAR
TO FIND I WAS PREGNANT CAUSED MANY A TEAR
WE WERE SO OVER WHELMED,EXCITED AND HAPPY
I COULD ALMOST IMAGINE CHANGING UR FIRST NAPPY.
FOR THE FIRST 5 MONTHS ALL WAS GOING SO WELL
MY BUMP AND MY ANKLES,THEY REALLY DID SWELL
THEN A VISIT TO MY DOCTORR FOR A ROUTINE ANTENATAL
WAS TO PROVE TO BE HEARTBREAKING AND EVEN FATAL.
WE WENT TO THE HOSPITAL TO SEE WHAT WAS WRONG
THROUGH THE TEARS AND FEAR WE TRIED TO BE STRONG
A SCAN SO SADLY REVEALED THAT YOU HAD DIED
BY THEN THE PAIN WE COULD NO LONGER HIDE.
WE JUST CRIED AND CRIED AND CRIED SOME MORE
THE BAD PAIN OF LOSING YOU HURT TO THE CORE
IT WASN'T YET KNOWN WHY YOU SLPPED AWAY
WE WERENT TO KNOW TIL THE BREAK OF A NEW DAY.
THAT NIGHT BACK HOME I DIDN'T WANT TO SLEEP
I KNEW ALL I HAD LEFT WAS MEMORIES TO KEEP
THAT NIGHT WAS SO LONG,MISERABLE AND WET
ITS ONE NIGHT IN DECEMBER I'L NEVER FORGET.
THE NEXT MORNING CAME AND WITH IT A BLUR
WHY WAS THIS HAPPENING?IT JUST WASN'T FAIR!
I DIDNT WANT PAIN RELIEF WHEN THEY INDUCED MY LABOUR
EACH MEMORY OF YOU I JUST WANTED TO SAVOUR.
YOU ENTERED INTO THIS WORLD AT 9:30 AT NIGHT
MY WORLD WAS SO DARK,HOW COULD I SEE LIGHT?
YOUR DADDY AND I,WE SOBBED AND SOBBED
WE TRUELY FELT LIKE WE HAD BEEN ROBBED.
YOU WERE BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT,OUR WEE BABY BOY
OUR TEARS OF SADNESS SHOULD OF BEEN TEARS OF JOY
WE HELD YOU WE KISSED YOU WE SAID OUR GOODBYES
ALL WE HAD LEFT WERE THE TEARS IN OUR EYES.
YOUR NOW A PRECIOUS ANGEL IN THE SKY UP ABOVE
AS WHITE AS SNOW AND WITH WINGS LIKE A DOVE
I KNOW YOU'L WATCH OVER ME AS I THINK OF YOU
YOU'L BE RIGHT THERE WITH ME IN ALL THAT I DO.
TIME IS A HEALER,SOME DAY IT'L EASE MY PAIN
MY HEART WILL GO ON KNOWING WE'L MEET AGAIN
NOW GO FLY WITH ANGELS MY PRECIOUS WEE SON
HAVE LOTS OF LAUGHTER AND MILLIONS OF FUN.
I'L LOOK AFTER YOUR BROTHER AND SISTERS DOWN HERE
YOU'L ALWAYS BE ONE OF THEM,SO PRECIOUS AND DEAR.
I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART KENNETH XXXXX
walking with angelsi'm very lucky to have 6 healthy beautiful children, 5 daughters and 1 son. when i discovered i was pregnant with my 6th child i was already separated from her dad and decided i didnt want anymore children or failed relationships so i got sterilised after my daughter was born. i was happy with my decision until 2 years later when i met the most wonderful guy ever.
after 3 yrs together i got unsterilised and we tried to get pregnant.it took us what seemed like the longest year ever,to get pregnant.we were so excited and blessed 2 be pregnant and done everything possible to maintain a healthy pregnancy.because i was unsterilised there was a risk of ectopic pregnancy and at 6 weeks we had a scare.
i was taken into hosp believing it was an ectopic pregnancy.blood tests were done over 48 hrs which proved it wasnt an ectopic and things progressed great.i had my 12 week scan.....all was well.i had my 20 week scan.....all was well.i thought by this stage nothin could possibly go wrong.
then on 19 th december when i was almost 24 weeks pregnant i went to my dr for a routine ante natal
and he couldn't hear the babies heart beat.i went to my maternity ward were they done a scan and sadly they couldn't find a heart beat.it was obvious my baby had died.it was only the size of a 19 week old baby.
i was sent home until a bed was available on the gynea ward next day.i was in denial that night and the next day at hosp they scanned me again before starting my labour.me and my partner were left alone in a side ward in gynea through my 7 hours of labour.it was one of my worst labours physically and obviously emotionally.i gave birth at 9 20 pm on 20 th dec.no dr came to see me,just a nurse who was about 70% sure i had a wee boy.
they took him away before we could see him but told us we could see him once they checked him over and cleaned him.after an hour our son was brought to us.he was perfect in every way but the cord was wrapped around his neck which was the obvious cause of death.we were devastated and in shock and held our baby boy for a while before the nurse took him away again.
the next morning at 8am a dr came to see me and told me he believed it was a girl! my partner came back to the hosp and we saw our baby again and named her angel.we spent the day waiting fo a dr to come back to us about what to do next.at 2pm the same dr came with post mortem forms and other things to sign etc.while filling out the forms for our daughter the dr then announced that he thought it was a boy!!
my partner and i then decided the only examination we wanted for our baby was to determine the sex of it.the dr said he was pretty sure it was a boy so we quickly decided to call him kenneth after his daddy. we returned home that day and the emptiness i felt was so painful.i suppose i am lucky that i had 6 other kidies to go home to but i wanted my baby boy more than anything else in this world.
the next few days were long and dark and it took me 30 minutes to do my christmas shopping.the world carried on as normal but my world was in pieces.
we went to the funeral home with our minister and had prayers on christmas eve b4 going home to arrange christmas for the other young kids.
faith helped us through the next week til we had our son cremated then on tues 22nd jan we buried his ashes at a tree we bought 4 him in our local cemetery. then on thrs 24th jan i was taken into hosp with severe blood loss.i needed a d & c to remove the remains of the pregnancy.i had a bad infection which could of been prevented if i'd of been scanned or given a d & c after giving birth.i was in hosp 4 days and only got home today.
i know my baby boy is an angel now and he's with me every day.its been faith thats brought me through the hardest 5 wks of my life.i'l always miss my baby & no other will replace him but i hope one day i'l get pregnant again.
to anyone who has lost a baby.....i feel for you,i pray for you and i can assure you that time is a great healer along with faith.
god bless xxx
Miracles and LossesI was 16. I was having the time of my life. I never smoked, drank, or took drugs, but I was a wild one. I had a new boyfriend every week. One day in January, my boyfriend proposed to me. I accepted, knowing how young I was.
4 weeks later I started feeling bad...just out of the blue. I was just sitting in my living room watching tv and i started feeling nauseous and tired. The next day my symptoms hadn`t let up. I had a feeling that I might be pregnant so I bought a pregnancy test. I took it and it came out positive. Me and my boyfriend were so excited. The next day I went to the doctor and discovered I was 5 weeks pregnant. My entire pregnancy was normal and I went on to deliver a baby boy named Luke.
2 weeks after Luke`s birth, me and my boyfriend got elloped at a nearby church. It was a very small wedding. About 8 weeks after Luke`s birth...I started feeling weird again. I was 17 now and realized that I might be pregnant again. I took a test and discovered I was. Less than 2 months after giving birth I was pregnant again. I went to the doctor and discovered I was about 4 weeks along. I felt sick and tired...but not as severe as it was with Luke.
At 8 weeks I started feeling cramps and began bleeding. I realized that my baby was probably dying...but I didnt want to believe it. my womb was just too week to go through another pregnancy so soon. I went to the hospital when the pain became too severe. They coldly told me there was nothing they could do and sent me home, but told me to rest.
Later that night I felt something strange coming out. I ran to the toilet and when I pulled my pants down..what looked like a tiny baby fell into the toilet. It was surrounded by its sack of water...which had burst. I picked up my tiny, tiny baby and held it. I cried and cried. Me and my husband burried it in our back yard. We, of course, found a box to put it in. We wrapped it in an old towel and burried it. I cried so much, but the pain was worse because I actually saw my dead baby.
Its 4 years later...but it still makes me sad to think about it. I now have a two year old daughter and Im 13 weeks pregnant. My current pregnancy has gone on without a hitch. So...I have Luke, who is 4, Savannah, who is two, and im 13 weeks pregnant. It felt hopeless during the miscarriage but there is always light at the end of the tunnel.
non-viable fetusmy daughter just was told that her fetus has no heartbeat. she was 8 weeks pregnant, she went to her first ob check and that was the news that she heard. how terrible for her.
she had a d and c 2 days later. thats not the all of it. just one year ago she was 5 months pregnant and went into preterm labor and did not know she was in labor ended up delivering the baby at home by herself. she said she felt like she had to go #2 and out the baby came yes, in the toilet. very sad.
the hospital reassured her that even if the baby was delivered at the hospital, that it still would not have lived. no lungs at that time. two babies in two years. she will not be trying again for about five years.
loss of my babyjust found this site and find it is helping as i do feel as people have seemed to brush my miscarriage away.
i miscarried my baby 5 days ago and i feel as if no one understands why im hurtin so much and why my body is aching for my baby. Being told so many times that it wasnt meant to be has brought no comfort but instead made me more angry -- to me thats what you say when you dont get a job you wanted not when you lose a baby.
Ive been tryin for years and cant understand why i had to wait for so long and for it to be taken away so quickly. Would anyone know the best time to fall pregnanat afterwards?
for everyone whos been through this pain i wish u all luck for future pregnancy . i take comfort in the knowledge that my baby is with the angels and is with me every day.
i love u my darling x x x
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