Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.
all hope is gone
I wanted to update my story. I was waiting for symptoms of miscarriage to begin, after being told the drs could not find a heartbeat. It was the second time in a little over a year that I was having to endure this pain. I thought I was devastated last time!
I began to bleed 2 weeks after the scan that told me I was going to lose my baby. To begin with I still believed it was nothing more than a little spotting, how wrong I was! I began having contractions on 29th march. They got steadily worse throughout the day, by 4pm I was in agony (and scaring my children, due to the screaming). I phoned my dr who told me to go straight to the hospital where they would do a d&c.
My husband and I arrived at the hospital and were informed by a nurse that the dr would be as quick as possible but that it was very busy in the delivery ward! (Very tactful!) I lay there in agony; I was not offered any pain relief, had I been in labour I would have been given it as I walked through the door! The dr soon arrived and gave me an internal exam, he told us that the amniotic sac, complete with embryo had got stuck in the neck of my cervix, and he would need to remove it. He did so whilst causing me extreme agony.
It has been three weeks 5 days since and I am trying for the sake of my husband and my three beautiful children to focus on the positives. I spend half my time thinking about getting pregnant again, and the other half dreading getting pregnant again.
I am absolutely convinced that if I fall pregnant again it will end in miscarriage! I have no hope left.
Life doesn't always work out as plannedThanks for sharing all of your stories - it really helps to read about others in the same boat!
When we decided to have a second child - my daughter was 6 months old. But I knew exactly when I wanted the baby - August or September of 2007. My daughter was born in August 2005 and it was perfect because I am a teacher and had the school year off.
When I found out that baby no.2 was coming this August I was ecstatic. My plan had worked perfectly and once I passed the 12-week mark I told everyone who would listen that I was expecting. My daughter started to rub my belly and say Hi Baby. In March I had some slight spotting and ignored it for a week or so - finally I decided to go to the hospital so I could put my mind at ease.
The doctor couldn't find a heartbeat. I was sent for an ultrasound and told the devastating news- the baby had been gone since 10 weeks - I was now 17 weeks. I was in shock - I had no warning signs other than a tiny bit of spotting. I had a D&C the next day.
It is now the end of April and not a day or minute goes by that I don't think about my baby. My closest friend just found out she is expecting her second and I am so jealous - I was supposed to be first! Everyone keeps saying don't worry you'll have another but I wanted this one - and since I lost the baby so late in my pregnancy I can't even have another one this year - Does it get easier???
All I can think about is getting pregnant yet I am terrified of having to go through this again.
Second time in 9 monthsSarah, I feel your pain. I as well just miscarried again. I wrote back in 7-06 (I found out at 11.2 weeks that the baby's heartbeat stopped). In February 07 I found out that my husband and I were expecting again. It was hard to be too excited because once you have a miscarriage you also think it's going to happen again.
This time we wanted to make sure everything was OK before we told any one. I had my HCG levels checked several times; they indicated that everything was going good. At 10 weeks we started to tell people only because I was starting to show. At 10.1 weeks we found out that I had a blighted ovum. I'm 35.7 years old. My doctor said my "eggs" are old.
I'm not sure what the future holds but I can tell you that GOD says that all things are possible and he will direct our steps. For those of you who feel alone remember that GOD also says "I will never leave you or forsake you"
saying goodbye to our dear who we never say helloIt's my first time of pregnancy and we're very excited waiting for this.
Until the time we've been on a 4 days vacation I only knew and confirmed that I was pregnant then... the rest is history.
During our 4 days vacation, I was 3 days delay then when I experience a day of light spotting and another after 2 days. After that, I never felt any cramping or pain. When we arrived home, I took 2 Home PT (2 consecutive days) and got both positive results. Though I was still in doubt, I went to a nearby hospital and get PT again... which is positive also.
From the moment we confirmed and really knew that I was pregnant, we are sooooo happy. We went to my OB and she gave me the necessary vitamins and supplements even though I am on my 4th week that time, we already choose the baby's name and had excitedly prepared everything... though we didnít buy any of the baby's things yet.
On my 5th week, I again experience twice (very light) spotting - each 1-day interval... then we decided to get checkup by my OB again just to confirm what was happening. The result of the trans-V was not quite very clear coz according to her it was too early to identify the heartbeat of the baby... though there was a small pea size spot (fetus like) on my uterus that time. The OB didnít confirmed if it was really the baby or just anything else... the dr asked us to return after 2 weeks which is supposedly my 6 weeks of pregnancy then. She also asked me to take a rest for those 2 weeks... so I was on leave from work.
That 2 weeks never came... it was only after 1 week when I experience bleeding and varying cramping. That time, I lay down and rest for a while just to see if the cramping will go. I decided to went to the bathroom and when I get up I feel something drop in my pad, as if something has slipped away from within... and when I take a look in the bathroom, I found a 2 pieces of tissues but I didnít panic.
Honestly, I was a little bit worried and asking myself, what is this. And when I sat (decided to sat on the floor and not on the bowl) and begin to pee coz I feel to, I noticed that there are something blocked on the tract, I reached through and pull it over and shockingly saw the large tissue again... thatís the time I started to panic and call my hubby immediately to take a look of it. I donít know... its a pink/reddish chicken-like-skin tissue about 5 inch long and there are 3 others but in smaller pieces. Gosh! I canít explain what it looks like... but I was brave enough to touch and feel it just to be curious whets happening to me. After these things came out of me, the pain went off and started to feel better.
We immediately went to the hospital and have checked by my OB. She have me TransV and it was then that we found out ... sadly... it was a miscarriage.
Perhaps, it is not yet for us. We are not loosing hope. It was taken maybe for some very good reason. God only knows what is that reason.
missed miscarriageSaturday night 2 weeks ago I had a dream. I had miscarried in the dream and was screaming and crying but no one would help me; then talking to God, I finally said "Thy will be done, only be with me and comfort me".
When I started to spot the next day, I was scared silly because of the dream. I had an ultrasound the day after that, and they confirmed that there was no heartbeat, and although I was 13 weeks the baby hadn't developed past 8 weeks. Of course I bawled, but I was prepared to ask for and accept God's love and comfort. I have never felt so spiritually connected.
I feel His love stronger than ever before, everything reminds me of His love. I am so grateful for the dream that prepared me to not freak out. My midwife suggested blue cohosh and black cohosh to start the miscarriage process, with the caveat that it would do nothing if my body wasnít ready. It didn't.
A friend recommended and my midwife approved false unicorn and lobelia, my stomach didn't tolerate that well so I didn't take any more. I took a few days off, and when I spotted a bit more I took a few more rounds of the blue and black cohosh. My water broke yesterday morning (wasn't expecting that for some reason), I've been passing 4 & 5 inch clots and just passed the whole placenta I think (wasn't quite expecting that either).
I could have steeled myself for a D&C if it had become necessary, but thankfully I found alternatives and thankfully they (and/or patience) worked. I think God had a plan in making me wait 2 weeks. Instead of feeling sad (well, a little of that) I mostly feel relief. It has been sad, I cry a few times a day; but I've also realized how many blessings I have in my life.
My husband has been so wonderful through this, my family has really made me feel so cared for, though I never got to hold my baby maybe that would have been worse (depending on my attitude I suppose), I can practically feel my Saviors arms around me. If any of you have belief or faith in God and/or Jesus, I hope you will turn to them for comfort. They love you and so greatly want to comfort you.
Also I hope you have family members to help you through this, or friends...let them be with you (or bring a dinner or help with your other kids, or whatever) even though they may feel awkward. I had a friend bring my family a dinner; even though we didn't need her to do that, it was sweet and let her DO something (most people feel awkward because they want to help but don't know what to do) to show her love and concern.
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