Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.
Trying again a year on after miscarraige
Dealing with a miscarraige is really hard and I guess you do think about it less and less....but for me 16months on we are still trying for our first baby after our mc at 11 weeks. It feels so hard when friends around me fall pg so easily and go on to have children and we are still waiting..
are going for our tests know in a month. I guess so worried that something dreadful has happened to us to our bodies or to my body after the miscarriage that I havent been able to conceive again.
I guess to I am worried that it might never happen again for me and I know that the worrying dosent help ttc to get pregnant....but its all a horrible circle of never ending worrying and waiting
but please god one day it will happen for me as I know I will make a great mam
Miscarried at 7 weeksI just don't understand last week I went to my doctors, the heartbeat was strong and everything was good. Today a week later I went back and there was no growth from last week til now and no heartbeat. This is my first miscarriage and I'm feeling so confused. I want to try again but I'm so scared. I just don't know how to feel. I think I'm going crazy.
MiscarriageI am 38 years old & I have 2 children from a previous marriage. They are 15 & 17. I am 5 years into my 2nd marriage & 3 months ago we were surprised with a pregnancy. I went for my monthly check last week & they couldn't find a heartbeat. The ultrasound revealed that the baby had died at 11 weeks. I had no indication that anything was wrong and I want more than anything to have a baby, however I am so scared now because of my age, but I can't imagine my life without a baby. Does anyone have any advise? Please help me!!
TracyMy story starts with me and my new husband.. we have been together a little over two years now. We have a wonderful and dedicated love for each other, a once in a lifetime type of love. In May 2006 my wonderful husband paid for me to have a tubal reversal. I have three children from a previous marriage that lasted ten years. He has two sons, one of which he adopted. I had the reversal in May. They told me to wait i think like 6-8 weeks before trying to get pregnant.
I waited my time and concieved on the 27th of June. Wow talk about happy.. I was so excited.. We didnt tell anyone about the reversal until it was confirmed that we were pregnant. Then we told everyone! I was exstatic! I did ok for the first six weeks. I was making all the plans for a new baby. ( of course I was buying strollers and stuff before I even found out! lol) but I just could not have been happier. I wanted a baby so bad with my new husband and he had done everything possible to give me that.
I had just met a new dr. I called her on Aug the 11th cause I had started to spot. I told her I was spotting and she didn't think there was anything to worry about because apparently that is not uncommon. on the twelvth I had started to bleed a little more and I had started to cramp. I went to the ER on the twelvth. The dr there told me he was confident I was having a miscarriage so apparently there isn't anything they can do for a miscarriage. I went home and I cramped for two more days really badly.
On the 14th I lost that precious bundle of happiness that had came into my life. I was so hurt and so upset. I loved that baby so much already in just less than 8 weeks. I fell so in love with that baby before it was ever concieved. I went through a phase where I was wondering if I had done something to cause it to happen. I wracked my brain thinking and replaying every little thing I could remember back through my mind.
The way we delt with the whole loss was we got a wooden box that daddy built with his own hands and I decorated that box with flowers and all the families pictures and all of the things I had bought and gotten for the pregnancy and put those things in the box. We named the baby "Tracy" for the trace of time we had Tracy in our lives and the trace of love tracy left behind. we wanted a name that could be boy or girl since we did not know the sex. We used Shawn for the middle name which meant "God is gracious" because we felt God was so gracious to let us borrow Tracy for a little while. I made a memorial obituary and placed it in a beautiful frame and attached it to the lid of the box.
So we had a time of grieving for Tracy and put the box away when it was time. We will never forget Tracy and I know that Tracy is in Heaven in the loving arms of Jesus. It is comforting to a point but I feel like I am missing a major part of my life. The tears still come and probably always will. Life goes on I know, but that is probably the hardest thing I ever delt with in my life.
Our first childWe waited a long time to try for a baby 15 years, we meet when I had just turned 15 but we wanted to make sure we had a house,stable jobs etc - the usual stuff everyone worries about. I have always wanted to be a mother and that feeling has only gotten more acute since the death of my own mother almost 7 years ago.
When we decided we were definitely ready I monitored my dates and we conceived first time! To say we were excited was a major understatement. We were so proud of ourselves and I revelled in being pregnant - despite the tiredness. Due to the fact I had been monitoring my dates I knew every Sunday was another week on, so at 7 weeks we told family. This was their first grandchild all around.
The week we miscarried was the first week I physically felt pregnant. My trousers were starting to pinch and I could feel like a round lump when lying on my tummy. On our 8th week day 5 I started to get period like cramps and a few spots of brown discharge. At A&E we were given an internal ultrasound which showed the sac still in place, we left on the advice should the bleeding or pains become any worse we were to return.
We only live about 20 mins from hospital and as soon as we got home I went to the toilet. As soon as I sat down I felt a weird sensation and thought it was some of the gel following the ultrasound but I looked down and there was this bubble of tissue. I knew in my heart that was our baby. As it was late in the night and we were both traumatised we waited until the next morning to return to hospital, taking our baby in a sample bottle instead of inside me.
We had another ultrasound which confirmed that yes the baby was gone. At this point I have to say whether due to lack of sleep or grief I was still clinging to the hope that our baby was still there.
We came home and told family and friends a little while later. Their support has been fantastic and we are so glad we told people because I couldn't have imagined just the two of us going through this on our own - it's too traumatic.
This was our first child, and there are times when we just don't know how to express how massive a void this has left in our lives. For almost 9 weeks our baby had been the centre of our universe and now its gone.
We bought some flower bulbs which should bloom around the time our baby was due, 29/4/07. I have written a letter from Mummy & Daddy to place at the bottom of the pot. Writing the letter helped me express some of my feelings, as has writing this.
Good Luck to anyone who is trying for or carrying a child, I sincerely hope all goes well. And remember despite all our planning and getting ready this is something none of us has any control over.
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