Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.
A journey cut short
I am 36 years old. I have a son age 15 yrs and a son age 10 yrs. I've been with my partner for 17 yrs. We were surprised but happy to learn I was pregnant for the third time. I had given up trying and I just thought it couldn't happen because of the time it was taking. I thought this baby was meant to be and adapted my lifestyle to look after my pregnancy from the start. Healthier food, less work etc.
I started spotting and bleeding on and off from being 11wks pregnant the first scan showed the baby fit and well and the correct size for dates. The bleeding continued over the next two weeks so I returned for a further scan that showed again the baby was fit and well however there was a bleed sight at one side of the placenta which could be contributing to the bleeding. I was told to take it easy.
Two days later out of the blue I had a massive bleed and returned to A&E. A scan the next day revealed the baby was amazingly still alive and kicking but another bleed sight had occured at the other side of the placenta. The sonographer seemed concerned but also said that she would monitor the situation on a weekly basis. I was just happy that I was still pregnant.
The following weekend I began having mild contractions. On Monday I returned to the hospital and they carried out another scan and the baby was still with no heartbeat. It was a mind numbing experience to see this situation for yourself. An awful sence of disbelief.
I was sent on the gyny ward and told of my options of natural, medical (drugs) , surgical (D&C). I stayed in hospital overnight to gather my thoughts and since I am fearful of intervention. I am now sitting at home anxiously waiting for my cramps to get stronger and my blood loss to get hearvier.
Everyones experience is different but at the minute I am sad but I just need to get this final stage of this doomed pregnancy over with. I would rather give birth! I am so fearful of the unknown, what will I see at 14wks, how long will it go on etc. If nothing happens soon naturally, I know I will go back on the ward (they are expecting me)andI will have no choice but to take the drugs which help empty my uterus. At the moment I feel that I will be able to deal with my emotions when this last part of my ordeal is over. I know there are going to be good days and bad days ahead. I have a loving supportive partner to help me. My mother used to say "If you don't have them to laugh with, You don't have them to cry with".
A journey cut short
loss second babyI have a perfect baby boy 9 months old. I found out I was pergant again. I started to bleed. I called the doctors and they asked me if I have any pain. I said NO. Next day I was still bleeding so I went into the hospital. They didn't found a heart beat. I was 11 weeks. I just can't understand how I am so lucky to have a first child without any problems then the second I lost.
However now I am so scared reading all of of this other stories and that people have lost the children at 9 months without a heart beat. I am so scared to have another child now.
my sweet babyI was 17 weeks pregnant and we went in for our normal doctors appointment. The doc could not find the heart beat. The next day I passed the baby in the ER. This is the heardest thing I ever had to go through. Am I going to be ok and How soon until I try again?
emptyCommon sense told me to wait unti the second trimester to tell anyone, but the easiness of my first pregnancy and that rising bubble in my chest just made me confess it to anyone that got close to guessing. Not that it would have mattered, since we made it to 3 months with not even a suggestion of a problem and I would have been telling people about it just days before the miscarriage began...
Wednesday I started with the brown mucus and that moment I just knew. If you've delivered before you might recognize or remember the really peculiar/particular smell of post-partum blood. I associate it so strongly with those first few hospital days after my son was born and I knew when I smelled it again that this pregnancy was over.
Bled lightly all day Thursday and went to bed praying for a good night's sleep before what I knew would be a difficult process. My water broke at 6 the next morning and the next few hours at the ER were like a mockery of labor and delivery - increasing contractions, dad holding my hand, helpful doctors peeking inside, and finally the unmistakable urge to push. Out he came, my little boy, already gone for two weeks at that point.
I feel like a ghoul, but I wanted to see and touch him - to know he was real and that I wasn't just grieving a dream. I sang him a lullaby and touched the back I would not rub to sleep and the belly on which I would not blow raspberries. His hand was the size of a pin head. I couldn't count all of the angels dancing there.
You Would Have Love US!Things were going pretty good. We had an early scan at 6weeks and it showed a strong heartbeat of 147+ beats. We were really excited about this news. We have an 8 1/2 year old daughter and a 4 1/2 year old daughter. Everyone was getting very excited! We did explain to the girls that sometimes when you plant a seed, a flower does not bloom. This little early lesson has helped with our situation. A couple of weeks after the ultrasound I started spotting some but I was being very positive about it. The next day again, I call my DR. He wanted me to come in for an ultrasound and a visit. On the ultrasound our baby did not have a heartbeat! I was devistated. We had to go to the hospital for a D & C,E. It was done and now we are at home. This little one that I referred to as "Bump" would have loved his two sisters and of course his mommy and daddy. I am trying to remember that there will come a day when I will see this beautiful baby and I will know that it was my"Bump". We will never forget about this loss. It was our baby, it was a part of our family! Please keep us in your prayers!
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