Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.
great sadness and anger
We were so excited when we learned right before Christmas that we were pregnant. We have a 3 1/2 yr. old daugher that was so excited. We bought a "Big Sister" shirt for her and this was a really cool way to tell our parents the news at Christmas time. Things were going so well... I seemed to be showing a bit, but felt pretty good, just tired. Well, the bleeding started on 1/6 and I called the dr office to find out what to do, but was told that as long as the bleeding was not heavy and the cramps were not too severe, that this was normal. I spotted and cramped all evening. I was awoken from a still sleep with cramping at 3 a.m. the next morning and thought, God, I hope this is not the end. The bleeding was heavier and I was starting to clot. I called the office as soon as it opened. The dr examined me and said that my uterus was "pregnant" and cervix was closed, he set up ultrasound to see how the baby was doing, but tried not to give us much hope. Unforunately, the ultrasound had no baby, no heartbeat, just emptiness... my heart sank. How do you go back and tell people that were so excited two weeks ago, that there is no baby to be excited about. I feel so confused and angry now... the tears have dried up. I just cannot understand how this happened and why...
stillbirthI has a stillbirth at 41 weeks and a day, the heartbeat went within 4 hours up until then everything was fine. we lost jake 23/10/2008 its devested us to lose a baby that far gone. we had no warning signs that anything was wrong still waiting for post mortum results. but 50/50 there will be no known cause which is worse.
HeartbrokenTwo weeks before Thanksgiving, my husband and I were sharing a microbrew beer when it occurred to me I could be pregnant. I only took a few sips before realizing I was not enjoying it like I normally did on a Friday night. I took a pregnancy test, and sure enough, it was positive-- we were shocked, ecstatic and so moved by knowing a new life had started. I could hardly wait until Monday came when I could schedule a doctor's visit. This was my third pregnancy and I was just shy of turning 39. Over the ensuing weeks, I had some brown staining here and there, but for three ultrasounds was reassured by a strong heartbeat. The dates were off by a week, however, and I was certain of my LMP, but went along with the doctor's theory I may have ovulated late. I worried nonetheless. On Sunday, December 22nd, I saw some red blood, as minor as it seemed to be, I was scared and went to bed very early. I called the doctor's office in tears the next morning and relayed what was going on. They sent me to get an ultrasound. I drove there by myself, fully expecting I would be reassured once again. The sonographer was very quiet and I finally asked if I could see the baby. She turned the monitor toward me and I saw the baby, but I questioned where the heartbeat was. She responded that she couldn't find one. I shrieked and immediately cried tears of the most profound sadness I have ever experienced. I called my husband while she found a radiologist to confirm the devastating finding. My husband told me how sorry he was, and I told him it was his loss, too. I cried the whole way home, and every day since this has happened. I had a D and C on Christmas Eve of all days. Although I was technically 10 weeks along, the u/s indicated the baby stopped growing at 8 weeks. I had no idea things went so wrong before I suspected there was a problem. I saw this baby's heartbeat before-- I heard this baby's heartbeat before-- and I had such great plans for this new baby. I am devastated-- and the loss is so invisible to so many people. I am angry at those who talk about 'nature's way,' and am consoled when people recognize this as a loss of human life. I don't know how to regulate the sadness I feel...this loss is just unbearable. I realize I need help coping and am just beginning to find resources to help me. This is why I am writing my story on this site-- writing about my miscarriage and talking about it seems to be helping. I am so sorry for everyone on this site experiencing this sadness like myself.
My wonderful pregnancy ended in complete devastatiOn August 9th, 2008 I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. I called my fiance who was on his way to work and told him the exciting, yet scarey news. He was overjoyed and couldnt wait to get home. I was about 5 weeks and 5 days. We told my family and his family, which now I wish we would have done. But everyone was so excited for us, wxcept one person who really didnt matter. Everything was going great. I had my first appointment at 8 weeks on August 28th. Blood work came back fine, my doctor said my uterus was exactly where it should be for 8 weeks. I scheduled my nexy appointment for September 25th and went on my way. My fiance and I would look at a pregnancy book to see what was happening each week. We had nicknamed our baby "Pumpkin" The moment I found out I was pregnant my world got turned upside down in a great way. I couldnt wait to spend my life raising my child into the person they would become, all the memories we would created. I didnt expect for it to just get ripped out from underneath my fingers. September 21st I started to have brown discharge at exactly 12 weeks pregnant and immediately I started to panic. By night, it was starting to get more red in color. The next morning I went to the emergency room. I just knew something was not right. They immediately rushed me into the back and ordered and ultra sound. I saw my little angel, but one thing was missing. My babys heartbeat. I instantly bursted into tears. I couldnt believe it. My whole world came crashing down that moment. My hopes and dreams, shattered into millions of little pieces. My mom was with me and ny fiance was at work. I called him and told him the baby did not have a heartbeat. He told 1 of his co workers who told him to go home by me. I was in denial. I wanted another ultrasound a couple days later. I thought maybe my pumpkin was just laying in a position blocking the heartbeat. But there was no heartbeat. I went to a follow up appointment that afternoon and my doctor said my hcg levels were not where they should be for 12 weeks and the baby was only measuring at 7 weeks and 3 days. I was pregnant for 5 extra weeks after the baby was already dead. Everything that I thought was happening, really wasnt. Today I should be 27 weeks and 2 days, but now all I do is grieve and sit and watch all my friends go on with their healthy pregnancies. Part of my heart has been ripped out and will never get back. I am having a really tough time handling this still, which doesnt help when you have people who have never gone through something like this, telling to get over it and move on. Easier said then done. So if there is anyone out there who wants to talk, maybe we can help each other come to grips with our losses and help each other cope.
i miss u more every day (mommy loves u)i was 17 just turned 17 i was two month pregnet i had been so happy i knew i wasnt ready but i was going to deal with it my babys father was there for me we are still together but i lost my baby i was at school and went to the barhroom and i had done seen what had happen all i could do was scream and cry when i went to the nurse she called my mom my babys daddy and the hospital later that day the doctor had told me and him the news i couldnt believe it why me what had i done to get this all i can say is dont have sex unless you are ready for all that comes along with it it could be bad or goodjust watch u do dont be stupid
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