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losing Karista

I noticed at around 23 weeks that i did not feel my daughter moving. I then noticed that my stomache looked softer and had dropped. I went to my regular 25 week checkup and the dr could not hear a heart beat. I got a sonagrahm and found out she had passed away. The dr. was surprised since I had an amnio and she had no problems. After she was born me and my husband got to hold her and take pictures which helped alot. We got an tests done and found out her cord was twisted so she could not get nutrients. The dr. said that it was rare for something like this to happen and that we could try again. It really helped to have a small gathering of my family on her due date to remember her and to answer questions my family wanted to ask. I will never forget her but it is try that it gets better every day!

kathie kiang

No heartbeat

On Monday I went for my ultrasound; I was going into my 13th week; I knew when I looked at the monitor something was wrong. No heartbeat. the baby had died at 10 weeks. I hen had a D&E in the afternoon. I'm 38 and we got pregnant our first try....it's almost like it was too good to be true. We are going to start after my first cycle..but I just can't get the picture of the tiny baby out of my head. It's hard to cope and I feel very isolated even though this has happened to so many women. I just hope that wasn't my only chance!

Angelique

Baby Greg

Our story.
I became pregnant on the first try! It all seemed so meant to be. I suppose it was meant to be, just not how I meant it to be.

My husband and I already had one child who was one year old when I got pregnant with baby Greg. She is very spirited, so this was a big decision. But, I really wanted her to have a sibling close in age. So we decided to go for it. Because I had already endured one pregnancy with no complications, it seemed like smooth sailing. I did not have all the fears that I experienced Olivia with baby Greg. I call him baby Greg because my husband is Gregory P. Samano II and he was to be Gregory Paul Samano III.

With Olivia, I gained 70 pounds. I was more careful with my second pregnancy. I didn't gain as much wieght. People would say, "Wow, I have never seen someone carry two babies so differently!' I was small, and so was my belly. Up until 35 weeks gestation, when baby Greg died, I was small. I mentioned this to my obgyn, and she said that I measured correctly. I also mentioned that I didn't feel the baby move as much as I had been. She said, " As long as you feel him in the morning and at night, he's fine." This could not have been farther from the truth. Baby Greg was not fine, and had not been for some time. His placenta was on 25% the size it should have been. He was only 3 pounds, when he should have been 5 pounds. These are things we learned after the fact. I still struggle with anger toward my doctor for having over looked this. Who else is to blame? God I suppose, but it is too painful to hate God.

The horrifying day.

It was the night before our wedding anniversary. Two whole years of marriage! But it was strange, I didn't feel the baby move all day. I was sure I had just not been paying attention. I pushed on my belly to wake him up. Nothing. I get the doppler out and search for the heart beat. Nothing. I was sure that I just couldn't find it. I ask my husband to help me find it. He can't find it. He's a doctor, but not an ob. I think, he must not really know how to find it. Although, he has always found it before. He thinks we should go to the hospital. Silence all the way there. There was a knowing that we could not discuss. At the hospital, no heart beat, fetal demise. Baby Greg died. Then the news about having to deliver. What a painful and horrifying experience. So very sad. I still cannot believe this happened to me. This happened 6 months ago. I am now pregnant again, with a baby girl. She gives me hope and strength. I will never forget baby Greg, I miss him terribly.

Alexia

I will never forget

My boyfriend and I were so excited when we found out that I was pregnant. It was unplanned, but we had always talked about having a family someday, it just so happened that it was happening a little sooner than expected. And that was fine with us. We tried to only tell close friends and family because we knew that there was a chance of miscarriage, but I honestly didn't think it would ever happen to me. And then yesterday I started bleeding. At first it was a little pink, and then it became red and I was having cramps. My friend took my to the ER because my boyfriend was at work. They did an internal ultrasound but didn't even find the baby. My hormone level was extremely low. They way that there is a chance that I am not having a miscarriage and that we will be certain when I got to the doctor on Monday, but I'm pretty sure this is happening. I'm in so much pain from the cramps, and there is so much blood. It's the worst feeling, knowing that there was life inside of me, and now it's dying.

Now I understand when people are asked if they want a boy or a girl and they simply reply that they just want the baby to be healthy. I kept saying that I wanted a girl, but next time I really only want the baby to be healthy. I keep worrying that I did something wrong. That I took too many or too few vitamins, or that I ate something bad, or was in the sun too long. My boyfriend keeps saying that it's no one's fault and that these things just happen.

Because this wasn't planned we probably wont try again for a while. We've decided that we will do everything we can to be as prepared as possible for the next time.

My heart goes out to all of you men and women who have lost a baby. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Sarah

My miscarriage

My name is Wendy and I miscarried my little boy Joseph on the 3rd of may 2008 at just over 14 weeks. It was such a surprise to find out being pregnant at nearly 40. I had just split with my partner so he was very shocked as well after trying off and on for nearly five years.
Being a type 2 diabetic and going onto insulin,was difficult but I started eating better. I was lucky that I had no morning sickness I just felt extremely tired.
But from week 9 I was at my local early pregnancy unit with bleeding every weekend until I lost him at week 14. I was so scared as I was at the hospital on my own. My ex and I had got back together and were so happy but when this happened I knew I had lost him forever.
Six weeks later I was dumped over the phone as he said he couldn't do it again and hasn't spoken to me since.
I miss both my boys very much and even nearly 16 weeks later I am so down as now I may be losing my job due to relocation. I don't know what to do as I have no family in Britain as I am Australian but have lived here for over 19 years.
I do so want another baby and hope to meet someone who will accept me for who I am but in the mean time I need to get over this depression,
I am not very good at talking to people in a group and do not want to end up on anti-depressnants so end up crying at home most nights and weekends. I guess I must give myself time to work through it and in the mean time try and find myself a new job so I can pay my bills.
Make you all take care.
Wendy

Wendy