Single Moms

It's not easy being a single mom. As a single parent, you have to take on double the parenting duty. Other issues can make this even more complex. For example, some young moms write about what to do if my boyfriend is an alcoholic. Please share your experience and wisdom. As you will see, these problems require a great support system, time management skills and top-notch parenting techniques. If you have tips to share with other single moms or just want to help other single mothers and single parents out there, then tell us your story.


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Help please...


I need to go to a doctors but Iím pretty scared. I did make the choice to get pregnant; me and my boyfriend did although now I am starting to get worried. Probably because I haven't seen him for a while and have no support from him on this issue, since he has family problems right now.

I've got all the symptoms apart from the missed period, as mine are so irregular I can't plot them out. Just wish I knew what to do next, although I know I want this baby if I am pregnant...


S






My mom is my hero!

When I was only 14 years old I made the biggest mistake of my life!!! I was always a good girl, never did anything wrong, was my moms perfect angel which she loved b/c my 17 yr old sister was a huge troublemaker!!

Well one night my sister and her friends were making fun of me for being so good and I just gave in too easily and slept with my sisterís boyfriend. She didn't care cuz she could now say I wasn't a virgin. I cried for hours and when my mom got home I told her everything and although she was mad at me, she was happy that I was safe and had told her the truth.

My mom, who is a single parent b/c my father divorced her and ran off when she was pregnant with me, doesn't go easy on anyone but she did on me b/c she could see how hurt I was. My sister lost her cell, TV, and had to move into my momís room as well as not going out at night, being driven and picked up at school by my mom b/c she slept around so often!

It was only a month after before my mom came up to me one day (when I was home from school b/c I had been throwing up) when my last period was and when I couldn't remember she took me to the doctor and promised to stick by me when they confirmed I was pregnant!

Now why she is my hero... shortly after that the father came to me and was suing my family b/c he claimed I had raped him. Which never went through but he would try to attack me or punch me in the stomach any time he could! My mom told me she was proud of me and asked me and my sister if we as a family were going to stick together and raise this baby! When we said yes she moved us to Houston, Texas from NY. She gave up everything, her job, friends, family, life just so the babies, me, Kaya (my sis who felt so bad after pressuring me to have sex) and my mom could have a better life and be safe.

If you didn't catch that earlier I did say babies! I had, 4 months after we moved to Houston, fraternal twins Payton James and Lucy Kaya named after my mom, Pat and sister Kaya. They are now 16 months old and gorgeous!!!! If my mom hadn't stuck by me I don't know where I will be!

To all the teens out there, come clean to your parents the night you have sex or when you find out your pregnant and say straight out that you want them to be there for you, it may work!

Hayden, Kaya, Lucy and Payton

Hayden






Band Baby

My name is Jessica. I am 17 years old, and I am the mother of a beautiful baby girl.

When I was 16 I was in my high school marching band. I was the lead marching clarinet. My boyfriend was drum major. One Saturday night in October, we had a marching competition and we didnít get back to the school until around 1 am. The bus was very dark and very quite as everyone was making out. Me and my boyfriend Ethan went a little too far, but I knew it was ok because I loved him.

2 months later I found out I was pregnant and I was only 16. I told Ethan and I cried for hours, I didnít want him to leave me but I figured he would. He didnít; he told me that he loved me and he'd always be there for me. My parents kicked me out when they found out so I moved in with Ethan. 8 months later we had a beautiful baby girl with red curly hair and big green eyes. Just like her mommy. We named her Stephanie.

She is now 1, and Ethan and I are in our senior year of high school. Our school has a daycare center so they watch Stephy while we have classes. Ethan and I are both Drum Majors this year in the Marching Band and our little Band Baby runs around the field being the little band geek she'll grow up to be.

Just because you get pregnant at an early age doesnít mean your life is over. It means another life is beginning. Itís two more feet that will walk. Two more hands that will touch. Two more eyes that will see. One more heart that will beat. And one more mouth that will speak.

Stephanie Lauren is the love of my life. If I had the chance to turn back time, I wouldnít. Every time she calls me mommy and reaches to give me a hug, I cry. If I gave her up I would be missing this wonderful opportunity. Iím glad she's in my life.

I love you Ethan, thank you for standing by me and our Band Baby....

Jessica






i thought it couldnt happen to me.... but it did

I was always pretty much a rebel. You know, skipping school, talking back to my mother; but I never really fit in. Then I met Dawn.

She was older and cooler. I started hanging out with her. On the weekends I would go to her house and drink and have sex with random guys then during the week we would skip school and go do crazy things. I really felt like I fit in. I was hooked on alcohol by the second week I started hanging out with her.

Then one night we didnít have any alcohol so we decided to walk around downtown. It was me, Dawn and a friend named Kirsten. We were standing in front of our high school when we saw this really nice convertible coming down the street. Dawn and Kirsten started hooting and hollering. I was a little embarrassed. But when they pulled up to the curb where I was standing I started to sweat. "You girls want to go for a ride?" the driver asked. So we all hopped in. we drove around for hours. I was so scared. But there was a guy in the passengerís seat who I had a little crush on.

But get this: here we are in the back of a car 14, 17 and 16 with 2 guys who are 30 and 20. After they dropped us off at Dawn's house I started to feel like I sort of liked the 20-year-old. I started hanging out with him on the low. Almost every weekend we were together. But when we would have sex I was nervous but after I would think to my self... no it wont happen to me I had sex with a lot of guys, I wont get pregnant.

Then one day it happened. I was at the mall and I threw up. I thought to my self no this couldnít be. First I miss my period now Iím throwing up. Iím only 14! It was true I was pregnant. I told the guy right away. He was excited. That week we planned to tell my mom together. But I just couldnít hold it in any more. I told her. The next day she pressed charges on my babyís father. I couldnít believe it.

He got out 2 months later though but I wasnít allowed to see him. That really tore me apart. Here I am 14 and 3 months pregnant and no support. Well 2 months after that my babyís father went back to jail because he came to see me. That was May 2005 now it is May 2007 and he is still in jail. The father denies him now but I know the truth. I have had my baby. He is 20 months old and the cutest thing ever.

I am 17 and live on my own because my mom kicked me and my baby out when he was just 3 months. It is hard sometimes being a single parent but I have learned from my mistakes. So girls if you feel like you donít fit in please donít go to extremes to prove that you can. Just be you.


audrey






19, pregnant, but determined

I currently have one year left on my drama course, and then have three years at university, then a one-year PGCE so I can begin my lifelong career of teaching. A month ago I found out that I'm pregnant, but with help from my tutors, my family and friends, I am still going to get my education and going to bring my son or daughter up with respectable values and work ethnics.

I met the father 2 years ago on a holiday to Spain whilst staying with some family. They introduced us and we hit it off (Although I was 17 and he was 24 at the time) in February this year I visited my family again and hooked up with the same guy (I am now 19 and he is 26) things took off from where we had left them two years before, and I ended up flying back out three weeks later to see him. We didnít really speak much when I got home so I figured it was a holiday romance that ended.

He was moving back to England to his hometown (which is about 300 miles away from where I live) and three days before he was due to drive home I went to the teen sex clinic and found out I was pregnant with his child. At first I was shocked into choosing a termination, but when I FINALLY got some time on my own, and discovered I could carry on with my career, I changed my mind. My family and my friends are very shocked with my choice, I am not the sort of person anyone would expect this to happen to, but although I am the least likely, I am probably the most capable.

I am in my 11th week, and researching new things everyday, Iím looking forward to getting a bump and having a second scan and finding out the sex. Iím not scared, but I am changing, my entire lifestyle will soon be completely different and I am already starting to let go of my old life. The baby's father is offering lifelong support, and I believe in my heart that he means it, but I also believe in my heart that ultimately, I am on my own.

The next five years whilst Iím still in education are going to be the hardest five years of my life, anything Iím imagining-ten fold. I have inner faith in myself and I know I am a strong person with a huge heart and a lot of love and passion to give. I do not plan on being on benefits for the rest of my life, and I do not plan on disappointing my child.

I know Iím going to be okay, and I hope my story helps other girls who are finding it hard to keep positive, just remember, when a baby is born, so is a mother.


Kate







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