Pregnancy Loss

Dealing with a miscarriage can be devastating. While many may pass off a miscarriage as a pregnancy that "just wasn't meant to be", these words rarely help to relieve your grief. Although a miscarriage can be an isolating experience, it doesn't have to be. Women who are or who have previously dealt with a miscarriage are often a great resource to those currently suffering from a pregnancy loss. Share your words with us and share your support with other women.

It is best to avoid using stimulants during pregnancy. Amphetamines and dextroamphetamines are powerful drugs and when taken during pregnancy, they can cause miscarriage, early labor or birth defects. You may want to ask other women if they have had personal experience with this.


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missed misscarage


Well I was going to the dr to get an ultrasound. Two weeks ago everything was fine, but she could barely get a heartbeat and it was low so she told me to come back in two weeks and she would do another ultrasound.

My two week visit was yesterday and she could not find a heartbeat but the baby was still there; Iím two months. I did not think she was right. I even called another dr and made an appointment, but sure enough last night I started spotting and cramping really bad and I still am today it hurts so bad it feels like I am in labor like with my first.

I am really scared cuz I donít know what to expect and Iím confused because I donít know why this happened. My first pregnancy was fine and now this. I just donít understand.

I am clueless and my dr just said everyone is different and these things just happen.


ashley






My little angel

In September of 2004 I was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes, which explained my weight issues, my irregular periods and the reason that after 2 long years we were still not pregnant. In July of 2006 our prayers were finally answered. I was pregnant!!! We wrote Poems and letters to our child and loved this baby with all our hearts.

My two older children, from a previous marriage, were elated. They are now 11 and 12. 18 months apart. I had gestational diabetes with the second. I have 2 boys so when, at 20 weeks, we found out we were having a girl we were so excited. We bought all pink and lavender. I didn't even know so many things existed for little girls. It was wonderful. My husband would talk to her and kiss my belly, something my previous husband and I took for granted as we were so young when our first was born. I was 16 and he was 19. Now at 27 it was great.

My two older boys would sit and watch my tummy jump and feel her move. My youngest would come into my room each night and say "Goodnight Addy", that's what we called her in my belly, and I'd have to tell him she was blowing him kisses and saying goodnight. They all had a saying for her, "Night night sleep tight don't let the belly bugs bite". This pregnancy was a blessing.

Then on March 12, 2007 I went in to a regular check up at 37 1/2 weeks. My doctor couldn't find her heart beat so he did an ultrasound and confirmed our worst fears. My little girl was gone. Later that day he did a C-section. She was 9lbs and 15oz 20 long and the most beautiful little girl I've yet to lay eyes on. Long dark hair and her daddy's perfect feet and hands. She had my ears and my nose. After recovery we held her in our room for nine hours. I didn't want to let her go. I thought, "If I just keep her here she'll move or cry". I waited and sobbed but I was so proud to have had her for even those nine months.

The hospital took pictures and we had a real funeral for her. She's buried at the feet of my brother who died at 3 1/2 months of SIDS 29yrs and 9 days before my little girl. Odd how that grave plot was open. Now my mother and I think that maybe my brother went before her to reserve her spot in babyland and in heaven. It's also odd that God took my grandmother's first child, my mother's second and my third. As we followed the van carrying our little girl to the grave wind chimes would ring until she was past and then stop when we got there. It was so surreal. My husband carried her tiny casket to her grave- about 100 yards with only little help from my own father.

Our little girl was and is the love of our life and I can't stop thinking that my body killed her, although we still don't know if it was the diabetes or something else. We're waiting on the reports still. My husband has no biological children previous to Addison. He adopted my boys just a month before we found out about being pregnant. He is adamant we will never try again. I think I feel the same way. This hurts so much. Every day is a challenge to wake up and breathe normally. I smile now but feel guilty that I'm somehow letting her down and am not supposed to ever be happy again.

I wonder if that will ever stop. I feel a great need to be around people constantly. I'm not scared to be alone but it hurts too much to think about everything and other people's problems seem better, somehow, than my own. I miss her so much. I'd give anything to feel her kick again or hear her cry. Even one nasty pooped diaper would be such an honor to me at this point. I just keep thinking at least I got to hold her. My biggest wish now is to try to live my life in a way that makes her proud to shout out to the other angels that I'm her mommy. I hope we're doing good so far but it hurts so badly...


April






can't admit defeat

Ok I donít know if I lost my baby...I am currently 11 weeks pregnant. But I have been bleeding heavy for the last week. This week was the worst though cause chunks came out...So I donít know.

I am extremely scared to go to the hospital because I donít want them to take it out of me. I want a baby so bad. I am not bleeding right now. So I donít know what to do next.

I called my ob/gyn and told her what happened but not the severity of it. I am going to wait it out.


alexis






Missed Miscarriage

The day I found out I was pregnant was the most shocking but exciting day of what I thought to be the rest of my life. I had told my partner and was thinking about all of the good things.

That same week I experienced bleeding and went to the ER. The doctor checked me over and recommended that I go for a scan ASAP. So I did, the doc did an internal examination and found my baby, it was very tiny and she could only just make it out, it was recommended that I return for another scan in 2weeks.

Once again I did, it was Fri13 and I had the strangest feeling all over my body; I knew something was wrong but was hoping it was just I being silly. I went in for the scan and once again it was internal, the midwife could see everything there apart from the heartbeat.

Then came the words no woman wishes to hear...Iím so sorry but it doesnít look good.... my heart sank, I froze and just cried. The consultant wrote up the notes stating I had encountered a missed miscarriage. The baby had been dead 3 weeks. This was obviously wrong because I had a scan 2weeks earlier and all was ok.

They have given me 2 weeks to miscarry naturally otherwise I would have had to have a D&C.

Since the 13/04/07 nothing has changed, no bleeding, no cramps etc. Everyday I wake hoping it will happen so I can move on with my life it has now been 4days since I found out I will indeed miscarry and still nothing...I'm going out of my mind with worry and stress, I want it to happen naturally and I want to be able to move on.

Why is my body not rejecting the fetus?


KIrsty






Miscarried Baby Girl

During my 16th week, I miscarried my baby girl. I feel so empty inside and emotional scarred. I lost her a week before my scheduled ultrasound.

My doctor said if I knew that I had a weak cervix, then he would have did a cervical cerclage at 12 weeks. This was my first pregnancy, How was I to know? He is the one with the medical degree; should I blame him for my loss?

I'm totally devastated!!!


Shannon







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